Wendy - The glue that has held us together

In many conversations, I hear myself talking about my “heart friends,” my soul mates. The few scattered women who have created me. The ones who truly know me and will always know me who I miss everyday are the ones I never see but constantly talk about, of course!

When one of those friends (Helen Harris) died last week, I immediately longed for the others. I wanted to reach out, fly to different cities, make phone calls, do whatever it takes to see each and everyone one of my soul mates again and let her know how I feel.
Lu inspired me with her blog about her “She Community” which has had me crying for days now. Why not? Why not blog a tribute to the gang that they can read? Well, don’t think that just because I’m blogging on each of you that I will fail to fly to you. I’m not done.

But I couldn’t do this without starting with Wendy, without whom I would have none of the others.

Lu’s right about you, Wendy. You are the “soul-lover who connects on deep levels with pretty much everyone,” and you are that friend who will not let us lose contact - that one true, unconditional love in my life that I count on to keep me from ever going completely under. Even in my worst, most unimaginable of bad times, while I lay crying on the floor, somewhere in the back of my mind, I know you’re still there for me. And you have created connections for me with so many other soul mates!

A long time ago, in a galaxy (called Los Angeles) far far away, I was standing in line for a movie by myself. A blue-eyed blonde with other-worldly beauty smiled at me and asked me if I was alone (and didn’t she just see me eating alone at a nearby restaurant?). I was invited to join her and her friend for the movie and within 24 hours I had one of the best friends I would ever have in my life.

I remember comparing Wendy to a sponge. She just sat there across from me at a table in Starbucks drawing everything out of me – my feelings, my life story, my heart – and I trusted her. Back then, I never trusted, but I trusted a girl I’d met only the day before.

Since then I have lived with Wendy, worked on projects with Wendy, sang with Wendy, Christmased with Wendy, sat up talking at Wendy until she fell asleep on me, and laughed and laughed and laughed with her (you guys know how amazing that laugh of hers is). And no matter where I go, what I do, who I become, or how hard I fight, Wendy will not let me get too far away. I never feel a distance or change in our friendship. I never feel like we “grow apart.” How is that possible? How does she do that?

But I only just realized that Wendy introduced me to Mary Lu, Debbie, Katy, Leticia, Sylvia, Shelley, Cindy, and Helen – women who would forever change my life and literally make me who I am.

And the last time that I spent time with Wendy, in person, was also the last time I would ever see Helen. If Wendy had not arranged our getting together, I would have missed that. Helen would never have met my daughter, Faeron, and I would not have that wonderful memory of the “Dread Mangos” weekend together – our last one.

Wendy, there is so much to say to you… about you. You are so encouraging and so accepting. You have taught me that the relationships in my life MAKE my life. You are the glue that holds the rest of us together, and I don’t know what would have happened to me without you.

I love you, dear Wendy (and I’ll bet I made you cry).